To get to the answer, I came upon a little story about two friends who were walking through the desert. At one point in the journey, they had an argument and one friend slapped the other one in the face. The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, he wrote in the sand, “TODAY, MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE”.

They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a swim. The one who got slapped and hurt, started drowning, and the other friend saved him. When he recovered from the fright, he wrote on a stone: “TODAY, MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE”.

The friend who had first slapped and then saved his best friend asked him, “Why, after I hurt you, did you write in the sand, and now after I save you, you write on a stone?”

The other friend, smiling, replied: “When a friend hurts us, we should write it down in the sand, where the winds of forgiveness are in charge of erasing it away. When something great happens, we should engrave it in the stone of the memory of the heart, where no wind can erase it.”

Perhaps that is the secret to a long-lasting friendship! Perhaps it is also the secret to a long-lasting marriage, or any other partnership in which we find ourselves! When someone we love or care deeply about does something to hurt us, we should consider it a temporary set-back in our relationship and forget it as quickly as the wind would erase writing in the sand. There is no point in dwelling on the problem, for that would only cause it to fester and could eventually ruin the friendship. However, whenever something good happens in the relationship, it should be recorded permanently so that we keep it first and foremost in our memories. That is why photos are so popular. They remind us of the good times.

Another humourous, but revealing story was told to me recently which gives us a clear example of how to tell who your true friends are.

Two men were travelling together when a bear suddenly met them on their path. One of the men climbed up quickly into a tree and concealed himself in the branches. The other, seeing that he would soon be attacked, fell flat on the ground, and when the bear came up and felt him with his snout, he held his breath and pretended to be dead. The bear soon left him, for it is said that a bear will not touch a dead body. When the bear was gone, the other traveller descended from the tree and jokingly asked what it was that the bear had whispered in his ear.

“He gave me this advice,” his companion replied. “Never travel with a friend who deserts you at the approach of danger.”

We must all learn to write in the sand if our friendships are to survive the test of time. Next time a friend hurts you, record the incident in sand so that it disappears from memory quickly. However, next time a friend does something especially nice for you, make sure you record it someplace where you will be reminded of it often, so that you never forget how very important that friend is to you.